Sports Requirement Expanded to Include a Mandatory Season of ESports for All Students

Sports Requirement Expanded to Include a Mandatory Season of ESports for All Students-Gabriel Grapes The Athletic Department announced two weeks ago that Western Reserve Academy’s sports requirement would be expanded to include a mandatory season of Esports for all students. “Video games are becoming part and parcel of daily life,” Mr. Haller explained, “so it … Continue reading

Athelete Spotlight: Roy Bae

Athlete Spotlight: Roy Bae-Sarah Starfruit It’s a bird. It’s a plane. No. It’s Roy Bae. A man of action, a man of character. As a star and captain of WRA’s premier conditioning squad, Roy has shown himself to be worthy of the highest praise. His constant enthusiasm for WRA athletics and the sports requirement alike … Continue reading

Does Mr Ong Use Shampoo or Body Wash?

Does Mr. Ong Use Shampoo or Body Wash?-Edwin Eggplant Everyone who has taken a class with Mr. Ong has come away haunted by “the Question”, whether or not they realize it. The Question might hit a student the moment they sit down on the first day of class, during riflery season, or even during sit-down … Continue reading

Mr. Gerber Raises Tuition by $10,000 to Support Community Minecraft Server

Mr. Gerber Raises Tuition by $10,000 to Support Community Minecraft Server-Gabriel Grapes Last week, Mr. Gerber sent out an email stating that he will raise the tuition of every student by $10,000 to support a new campus-wide Minecraft server. “In keeping with Mrs. Buck’s commitment to joy,” Mr. Gerber said, “the Technology Department would like … Continue reading

Student Body Co-Presidential Primaries

Student Body Co-Presidential Primaries-Eggy Fettuccine The primary season is well underway for the 2020-21 school year here at Western Reserve Academy, and the candidates for student body co-president are working hard. Wood House, the first-in-the-school caucus, held its primary in early February. Individual suites served as caucusing locations for Wood House residents. There were two … Continue reading

Students Sleep on the Streets as All Dorms Are Closed Due to Coronavirus Threats

Students Sleep on the Streets as All Dorms Are Closed Due to Coronavirus Threats-Queen Quince Residents of North Hall evacuating to sleep on the streets. Residents of Cartwright preparing to camp out. In the weeks leading up to the closing of campus due to the novel coronavirus, the dorms were preemptively closed amid concerns that … Continue reading

Choir Angered by Celebrity “Imagine” Video

Choir Angered by Celebrity “Imagine” Video-Edwin Eggplant Chances are if you’ve been online during self-isolation, you’ve seen this now-infamous video. On March 20, Gal Gadot, of Wonder Woman acclaim, teamed up with celebrities throughout the world to create a film of them singing the John Lennon classic Imagine, and all the different parts of the … Continue reading

Mrs. Buck Enrolls as a PG

Mr. Buck Enrolls as a PG-Grace Grapes   The 2019-2020 school year brought with it a host of new additions to the WRA faculty, one of the most memorable being Mrs. Suzzane Walker Buck, the new Head of School. Mrs. Buck and her administration instituted many new changes, pushing for more options that would hopefully … Continue reading

Ding Ma ’20 Moves to the President’s House after the New Food Ordering Policy

Ding Ma ’20 Moves to the President’s House due to the New Food Ordering Policy-Levi Lemon “Like twice a day,” Ding Ma ’20 responded when asked about the number of times he orders food every month. From a simple cheese pizza from Papa Johns to sublime Szechuan seafood from Noble House, Ding knows every restaurant … Continue reading

Brandt Aker Decides to PG Again

Brandt Aker Decides to PG Again-Alex Avocado With the introduction of the coronavirus into American society, hordes of students are suffering. This illness not only takes lives, but it is also stealing the most anticipated part of high school from the class of 2020. Their senior slide is more like a slanted chair, prom is … Continue reading