Conditioning Joins the Spring Athletic Awards

Conditioning Joins the Spring Athletic Awards

Garlic Deli ’21

Cam Wheeler ’21 being given the Absentee Award.

As spring sports wrap, Spring Athletic Awards are right around the corner to acknowledge the accomplishments of Western Reserve Academy’s exceptional athletes. In addition to our current roster of sports, this year the Athletic Department has chosen to give due consideration to one of the school’s most underappreciated athletic programs—conditioning. The following awards will be presented:

The Specialist Award: This award is presented to the athlete who truly embodies the ideology of building the maximum amount of muscle mass he or she can. This

athlete will be the one you see only working on one aspect of their body, whether it be lower or upper body (way too many times). In addition, this athlete has probably listened to Katy Perry’s song “Hear Me Roar” as they will not let themselves be unnoticed in the gym as their bellows and screams can be heard from across campus.

The Cardio Beast Award: This award is presented to the athlete who believes that cardio is the only thing that matters in life. Track and cross country are not enough for them. “Strength is for chumps” is what typically goes through this person’s head as their domain is limited to the elliptical, treadmill and rowing machines as the cardio grind never stops for these individuals.

The Absentee Award: This award is presented to an athlete who truly symbolizes the group of students that have no interest in athletics, but this individual goes above the norm and does not attend a single day in the gym. If this individual shows up for the Athletic Awards, they are immediately forfeited from receiving the award. This individual will most likely receive this award through the mail as they must continue avoiding the Athletic Department.

Voting will be done online to stay in line with the requirements of the awards. This will start in the next year, and the community wishes the athletes the best of luck in their efforts (or lack thereof) to help them earn these prestigious awards.

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